Why I LOVE Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life (and why you should too!!!)
I have HUGE AMOUNTS of respect for Jordan Peterson (we all know this).
In fact, (sadly and heartbreakingly) when Dr. Peterson was writing this book, he was struggling with a lot of health issues.
In a podcast he did with his daughter Mikhaila, he said it was even hard for him to figure out how to even basically lay down.
As I stated in my other article about Dr. Peterson, where I discussed 12 Rules For Life, I am INCREDIBLY grateful for his existence. (He has helped me through some of my darkest times, and he continues to help me and millions of others as well).
In this article, I will be discussing Dr. Peterson’s NEWEST book: Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life, where I will discuss and go into more detail and share with you as to why I love this book so much and why I think every single one of you should stop what you’re doing and buy and read this book. (I will also quickly say that if you haven’t read 12 Rules For Life yet, then you should definitely go read that as well).
But, (without further ado), here are the reasons as to why I love this book, (and why I think that you should love it too!):
With this book, Jordan taught me that with hardships, you have to keep going.
(As stated before, when Jordan was writing this book, he was going through EXTREME health issues. There were also many times in which Dr. Peterson notes that when he was writing this book, there were many times where he almost basically gave up writing this book, saying, “to hell with it”, but, I am so eternally grateful that he kept writing. Dr. Peterson writes about why he wrote this book, and he states:
“Why Beyond Order? It is simple, in some regard. Order is explored territory. We are in order when the actions we deem appropriate produce the results we aim at. We regard such outcomes positively, indicating as they do, first, that we have moved closer to what we desire, and second, that our theory about how the world works remains acceptably accurate. Nonetheless, all states of order, no matter how secure and comfortable, have their flaws. Our knowledge of how to act in the world remains eternally incomplete- partly because of our profound ignorance, of the vast unknown, partly because of our profoundness, and partly because the world continues, in its entropic manner to transform itself unexpectedly”. (Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life By Jordan Peterson, Page xxiv).
Jordan taught me that we need to talk to remember and to forget.
“We all need to talk about the past, so we can distinguish the trivial, overblown concerns that otherwise plague our thoughts from the experiences that are truly important: we need to talk about the nature of the present and our plans for the future, so we know where we are, where we are going, and we we are going there. We must submit the strategies and tactics we formulate to the judgments of others, to ensure their efficiency and resilience. We need to listen to ourselves as we talk, as well, so that we may organize our otherwise inchoate bodily reactions, motivations, and emotions into something articulate and organize our otherwise inchoate bodily reactions, motivations, and emotions into something articulate and organized, and dispense with those concerns that are exaggerated and irrational”. (Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life By: Jordan Peterson, Page 3).
Jordan taught me that it’s okay to be a beginner at times.
(You don’t have to be an expert about everything).
Jordan taught me about the necessity of equals, and that it is very difficult to move information up a hierarchy.
“It is good to be a beginner, but it is good to be a different sort to be an equal among equals. It is said, with much truth, that genuine communication can take place only between perks. This is because it is very difficult to move information up a hierarchy” (Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life By: Jordan Peterson, Page 21).
Jordan taught me that social institutions are necessary but insufficient…
Jordan taught me that in unfair or difficult circumstances, you HAVE to be fair.
(This is because when you play fair in unfair situations, you may then possibly achieve victory).
“There is nothing more important than learning to strive under difficult and frustrating circumstances to play fair. This is what should be chased, so to speak, during any game (even though it is also important to try to obtain victory in the games”. (Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life By: Jordan Peterson, Page 64.
Jordan taught me that you have to confront problems.
You have to face issues, you can’t just back away from them or pretend that they don’t exist. Keeping your issues to yourself is unhealthy and it is a destructive way to handle any sort of issue because at some point you may burst or erupt like a volcano. You can’t avoid issues, you have to face them in reality even though it may absolutely suck to confront problems.
I know so many people who are okay with confrontation, and some people are terrified of confrontation, but (what I have respectfully found, and what I have basically learned from Dr. Peterson from reading this book is that confrontation makes you a much stronger individual).
We, (as human beings), also all have levels of immaturity (or ignorance even).
I’m going to also be honest with some of you: I’m definitely not perfect when it comes to relationships or friendships. There have been things that have occurred in my relationships and friendships, and I own that.
I have also had to remove people from my life that I cared a lot about.
But, as Dr. Peterson stated:
“Failing to look under the bed when you strongly suspect a monster is lurking there is not an advisable strategy”. (Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life By: Jordan Peterson, Page 97).
You may have negative emotions, but sometimes you can’t let those emotions go, and (from what I have learned being on this planet for basically 20 years), is that sometimes you have to be straight up with people (or we should try to be. I have sometimes been so angry and hurt by people, that I just can’t bring myself to talk to them unfortunately, which is something that I should also definitely probably work on).
Jordan taught me that you have to set boundaries with people.
(Later on, I will talk about this), but when I was younger up until now even I was heavily bullied.
I have unfortunately been hurt by a lot of people, and about a year ago I was in a pretty abusive and toxic relationship, so when people hurt me or upset me I tend to isolate myself from those that hurt me due to some pretty awful past experiences.
It is pretty difficult to try and set boundaries with certain people.
Like I’ve said before, there are so many people that I love so much and that I dearly care or cared about that have genuinely emotionally drained me, and I had to let go of them.
(I call these types of people energy sucking vampires… you may encounter these types of people at at least some point in your life possibly where you will hang out with a person, and after you hang out or after a phone call or text session with them, you feel emotionally drained and sometimes even sad. It’s hard to explain the emotions that energy sucking vampires give you, but it’s definitely not a good feeling, and I encourage you that if you have people like this in your life who emotionally drain you, I would recommend possibly and respectfully getting rid of them).
But, some of these energy sucking vampires emotionally drained me, but at the same time, they also meant a lot to me, so it was very hard for me to let them go, and letting some of these people go was incredibly painful and hard for me… I cried for weeks and months after getting rid of some of these people.
As a kid, I kept a lot of things (unhealthily) to myself (not like bad secrets), but I kept my feelings to myself a lot basically because I noticed a stigma even as a stigma that if you’re vulnerable about some of your feelings, you may be ostracized or judged, (which I found to be unfortunate honestly), or people may even see you as a victim.
In December 2019, I was probably at my lowest point. I had a hard time eating or sleeping.
I felt pretty lost after getting out of my toxic and abusive relationship, but I felt a little nervous telling my family or friends what I was basically experiencing because (honestly), the last thing that I wanted was for them to worry.
But, you can’t keep emotions to yourself, and you have to set boundaries with people.
(It’s incredibly important and crucial).
Jordan taught me that we are much more responsible for the state of the world then we may think.
We can either be silent about corruption or injustices taking place around us, or we can try and possibly do something productive and stand up for what we believe in, but (as an individual), you can either sit down in fear, afraid of your basic shadow, or you can try and do something about it.
Now, I don’t want to sit here and say, “silence is violence” because I don’t respectfully or personally find that to be true, but I do not think being a bystander and keeping silent about the evils, injustices, prejudices, or corruption in the world is not (in my opinion) going to really help make the world a better place, and it’s not necessarily going to really help future generations either.
Jordan taught me to abandon ideology.
Individuals that (basically) take the route to authoritarianism, totalitarianism, communism, socialism, fascism, and marxism basically drift toward the dangerous side of society.
Ideology is pretty dangerous and it can oftentimes be a little detrimental to an individual’s mental health in dangerous ways.
You have to be careful with the basic OVERCONSUMPTION of ideology, because that can (sometimes) be unhealthy.
Both sides politically can act selfishly and shamefully.
It is important to try and stop blaming others, and instead it is important to address problems personally and you should also simultaneously then try and take PERSONAL responsibly for whatever outcome may possibly occur.
Jordan taught me that without a game, there is no peace, only chaos.
Jordan taught me that if you work as hard as you can on one thing, you will change.
Jordan taught me how dark and toxic social media and the internet can be, and Jordan taught me how hypocritical people can be as well.
There was a time when Dr. Peterson was (sadly) going through a lot of health issues, and he was also feeling mentally overwhelmed as well.
There was a still taken from Jordan’s office showing messiness in the background.
When this still was released by a stranger, people were basically calling Dr. Peterson a hypocrite when he wasn’t unfortunately in the proper order to take care of the mess behind him because he was struggling a bit mentally and physically.
Now, I don’t (respectfully) and necessarily think that this is an “excuse” but it should teach you that that the internet is a pretty dark and toxic place.
The person who probably took this still and then posted it on the internet for the world to see probably has some sort of mess in their house or apartment too.
The reason why we (sadly) may have a huge mental health crisis in America and throughout the world is because of the “perfection” or “highlight reels” persona on social media as well as with the toxic cyberbullying too.
I also think that it is important to mention a piece of advice that I still think about to this day, and that is that people who are doing less than you will always criticize.
Jordan taught me that we can learn things from difficult experiences.
Jordan taught me to not allow myself to become resentful, deceitful, or arrogant.
Jordan taught me to be grateful in spite of my suffering.
When I was younger and up until now in College, I was heavily bullied by my peers and I was also targeted by a teacher of mine in high school.
One of the biggest moments that I will never forget was during recess on the playground when I was 12 years old, when a mean girl who basically tried to make everyday for me an absolute living hell for me came up to me on the playground and said, “if you killed yourself, everyone would throw a parade”. Growing up, I was raised in a very religious household, and my parents, (especially my mom) was very strict.
Even before I bought a book at the bookstore, my mom would basically flip through my books to see if there was any nudity orc witchcraft.
So, at this point in my life, I had absolutely no clue what suicide was until this day.
And, after this interaction, I started to see myself very differently.
I started feeling very insecure.
I closed myself off from people.
I thought that, “maybe if everyone sees me as a burden, what’s the point of talking to people?” (I was 12 when I had this thought).
But, yet, I still tried my best to make friends, and I tried to shake off the painful interaction, but, (unfortunately) I will remember this interaction for the rest of my life because it made me see myself differently.
In college, I was also heavily bullied by my peers, and I was hazed and heavily bullied by my former sorority, which was a pretty painful experience for me.
I also basically got yelled at by a professor in the middle of a Zoom remote class because I was wearing a shirt with bible verses as well as a cross necklace.
In spite of how people have treated me though, I know that deep down God wanted me to experience these painful experiences and interactions because he knew that I could handle it, and that it would make me stronger.
Finally, I was, (and am still) incredibly thankful for my relationship with God, because through the darkness, he has taught me to remain hopeful, optimistic, and grateful for the little things in life.
(After all, optimism is, in my opinion, more reliable than pessimism).
Anyway, that is what I have learned from Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life by my mentor, Jordan Peterson.
People have asked me whether I prefer this book or 12 Rules For Life, and (honestly) I love both equally because there is so much that you can learn from both books.
People have also asked me what my favorite books are since I talk a lot about Jordan, and those rules are Rule 3 from 12 Rules For Life, which is “Befriend people who want the best for you”, and my OTHER favorite rule(s) from Beyond Order: 12 More Rules For Life are Rule 6: “Abandon Ideology” and Rule 12: “Be grateful in spite of your suffering”.
But, I also think that every single rule from each of these books are incredible, (but those are the rules that basically stick out to me and that have also impacted me the most).
I will definitely be reading these books over and over again.
I am eternally grateful for Jordan’s existence, and the world needs more people like him.
If you would like to purchase both books, (which I definitely think that you should), here are the links below: